The Smidge

Providing just enough bitter taste to unbalance your meal, the Smidge is an unfortunate addition to any well prepared cuisine.

His filthy brethren the Pinch, the Dab, and the Tidbit are just as unpleasant in their flavoring. Fortunately for all food preps, Teaspoon, Tablespoon, and the Measuring Cup Brothers are at the ready to battle these sinister portions.

Grode's Gopher

Considered the most popular stop at Hoggnoggin's Petting Zoo for All Things Hideous, the Grode's Gopher is a truly grody sight to behold.

"It's really more of a bulbous mouse-mole-rat-hideous-opossum-thing than it is a gopher," explains Hagg Hoggnoggin, keeper of this unsightly specimen. "It's soggy and greasy too. There's no doubt about it — as far as the grode factor goes, this thing truly has it all.

Organ Boy

While it's true that Organ Boy has see-through skin — revealing his squiggly innards — he's really named for his incredibly prodigious skills on the keyboard.

Only 8 years old, he's already a master organist.

The ButterBags Popcorn
Fun Hour

When Saturday morning arrives, you can bet your bellbottoms that every neevling in Chauceville is tuned in to the wildly entertaining ButterBags Popcorn Fun Hour.

Starring ButterBags Popcorn, the Fun Hour has been doling out salty sweet fun for 10 years running. "It's a truly wholesome show," states the Kernel — the prim and proper co-host and sidekick to ButterBags. "The kids love it and our sponsor, Pappy's Poppy Popcorn Cereal, hit record sales this year."

So plant yourself in front of the tube this weekend and enjoy an hour's worth of buttery fun. Then treat yourself to some delicious Pappy's Poppy Popcorn Cereal!  It's the Pappyiest! ^TM

Hypno Nester

Hypno Nesters are mesmerizing birds with a secret and crafty talent.

Accessibly perched in a town square or city park, the Hypno Nester entrances any cognizant being that wanders its way. Hypnosis complete, this feathery svengali commands the newly acquired "assistant" to do its birdly bidding.

Said bidding consists mostly of fetching worms, twigs and the occasional butterscotch — pretty harmless stuff.

Interestingly, before it expires, the Hypno Nester lays a solitary blue egg — a lone, self-incubating offspring destined to hatch and continue the strange, almost hypnotic lifecycle of this spellbinding bird.

The Wicked Nist

This foul floater is number one on Mooniss Weef's Comprehensive List of Super Creepy Things To Avoid.

No one knows the origins of the Wicked Nist but most every snig in Chauceville is familiar with it's disturbing diet.

To stay in top wicked shape, the Nist needs a serving of fresh veins each and every day. It will dine on them raw if it has to but much prefers a blood vessel linguini smothered in a Type O negative sauce complete with small side salad.

Bacon Egg Bacon

Perplexing even the most erudite critic of the dramatic stage, Frond Heimglide's newly released play "Breakfast — A Word", has theater goers across all of Sweemp scratching their heads in befuddlement.

"It's as avante-guard as it gets," proclaims Yoad Mothsby, breakfast connoisseur and senior editor for Post-modern Lad. "Heimglide labels the consumable and deconstructs the narrative to the essential. Egg is egg we are told, bacon is bacon. It may be a work of genius or he may have just been really really hungry — it's too early yet to tell."